In my early forties I ran a successful business in Toronto. I gave trainings, consulted to companies, and did keynote talks.
I was happy in my business. I was happy in my marriage.
And then, out of nowhere, my Soul spoke up and said: “No. This is not the direction your life should be taking now.”
I argued, “But look…everything on the outside is good. It’s really good….my work, my relationship.”
My Soul responded, “That’s fine but I’m not happy. You have to pay attention to me…..now!”
My Soul’s message was so powerful, so insistent, and so unrelenting, that I knew I had to pay attention.
I sold my business. We sold our home, and moved to a rented farmhouse in the country.
I wanted to take time out, to stop…to retreat. I continued doing just enough consulting to have some income and spent the majority of the time in contemplation.
For guidance I visited my friend and mentor, Anglican Bishop Henry Hill. Henry was a man I deeply, deeply respected.
I asked for his advice. He said a sentence that I’ve remembered to this day:
And that’s what I did.
My Soul didn’t want me to continue doing what I’d been doing.
The farmhouse had another building with a small room that I used as my office. I could go there and be alone.
I felt like my previous personality was ‘burning off.’ There was nothing to do but let the process take its natural course.
Very slowly I began to be aware of a ‘new energy’ coming into my Soul and into my body.
I knew the second phase, Renewal, had arrived.
RETURN
I began to feel my time in Retreat was coming to an end.
I was now living in a new relationship with my Soul. My very Being was different.
Retreat, Renewal & Return in Today’s World
My retreat was a choice that I could make at that time. I had enough money and the loving support of my wife. I realize that the retreat the world is currently experiencing is very different. We didn’t choose it. It’s being forced on us. People are experiencing difficulties with food and shelter, friends and family are ill, and many are devastated at the loss of loved ones. Our faith, our common humanity and our compassion are challenged in ways we could never have imagined.
My hope is that ‘Retreat, Renewal and Return’ will be a useful framework for you and others in these times.
We, Humanity, will make it through. And when we Return we will be stronger and clearer about what is really important. From this new state of Being I believe it will be time to create a new world, the world our Souls long for.
Martin
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Martin Rutte
